3 strengths I discovered through gentleness and how you can learn to do it too!
As I learn to step into a more authentic space within myself, I am continually confronted with the need to balance strength and gentleness.
For so long, I have experienced these two qualities as opposites and have allowed myself to express gentleness with very few. Gentleness meant vulnerability and vulnerability in turn meant weakness. I believed that it was my gentleness that invited people to betray me. I chose instead to be blunt and firm.
However, as I allow myself to embrace gentleness I experience more respect from others as well as new depth to my strength. Here are three ways the practice of gentleness has made me stronger.
1.Holding space for others to be authentic without the fear of judgement
As a mental health counselor, I believe I am a natural at this with my clients. The amount of empathy I am able to generate within professional relationships. has always felt easy. But I lacked the same skill when it came to my personal relationships believing instead that rigid boundaries would keep my relationships fair and honest.
I'm learning now that displaying gentleness gives others the freedom to own their mistakes and humanness without fear of criticism and cultivates emotional honesty and connection far beyond what I've experienced before.
2.The ability to flow and be flexible with change, big or small
Having a plan and sticking to it is a strength of mine. Grit and drive have allowed me to do amazing things, but they can be exhausting when I forget to shift out of the mindset. Being gentle with myself when plans change seems relatively simple, but I was fearful of being complacent. Moving into a detached state over things out of my control has taught me to realign with the energy of acceptance and appreciation rather than disappointment and victimhood.
3.A deeper connection and feeling of centeredness in my truth
In the past I mistook my influence over others as significance and authority. Every time I tried to prove my strength, I belittled my own power. Our strength cannot be summed up in one act alone. Real strength is choosing our own truth, time after time. I now know that I could never use an external entity to measure or validate the experience of inner strength. This knowledge keeps me grounded in my inherent self-worth and connected to my authentic self.
If you struggle with gentleness like me, it can be hard to imagine leaning into the discomfort of its vulnerability. It takes a cognitive reworking in your brain.
Appearing strong has likely been a survival technique that has served you at times, and you maybe fearful of letting go. I've included a free downloadable PDF below with journal prompts on how to release blocks to your gentleness.
Gentleness-through-strength-pdf
As a BONUS, I've included a guided gentle strength visualization in my free resource library. Get lifetime access by signing up here.
Start being gentle with yourself and see how strong you feel!
Light & Love,
Sunnie, The Alchemy Coach
